Ambassador Louis Susman
So my proposition to your world famous country is that whenever your wonderful leader President Barack Obama wants to have a break (for instance, a self catering holiday in Benidorm), I step in and take the reigns. I think I'm suitable for this role as I have mediated over 30 (31) domestic disputes in my life, and I suppose running a country is just like a domestic dispute but with more speeches (though I do tend to sign off domestic disputes with a speech).
American Embassy
24-31 Grosvenor Square
London
London
W1A 1AE
Dear Mr Susman
Subject; Leading The USA (for two weeks)
Subject; Leading The USA (for two weeks)
Let me start with a quote.
'Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society'.
I love this quote from the great American Mark Twain, I read it around twenty times a day, and every time it inspires me to put another layer of clothes on. So by the end of the day I am far from naked, I'm an influential ball of cotton, ready to step (roll) outside and take on the world. I hope this insight in to my daily routine underlines my credentials for this role I seek. What role I hear you ask? Patience Mr Susman, allow me to explain.
My name is Alex Ander, I have been working as a freelance world leader for around two weeks. This means that I'm available to run any country in the world nearly all year (I can't do the weekend of the 16th of October, there's a orchard keepers convention that I'm due to sing at).
My name is Alex Ander, I have been working as a freelance world leader for around two weeks. This means that I'm available to run any country in the world nearly all year (I can't do the weekend of the 16th of October, there's a orchard keepers convention that I'm due to sing at).
So my proposition to your world famous country is that whenever your wonderful leader President Barack Obama wants to have a break (for instance, a self catering holiday in Benidorm), I step in and take the reigns. I think I'm suitable for this role as I have mediated over 30 (31) domestic disputes in my life, and I suppose running a country is just like a domestic dispute but with more speeches (though I do tend to sign off domestic disputes with a speech).
Now I must get on to the tricky subject of payment. I have very competitive rates if you wish to pay in me in US Dollars, alternatively I would also do this work for no monetary gain. Instead I would do the work in exchange for a spot on Mount Rushmoor. I have been practising my pose and would be available to sit in front of the Mountain as a life model for as many years as it takes to finish, obviously apart from the 16th of October. Here is an artist's (I'm not really an artist) impression of how the finished article may look.
I have attached my CV which I'm sure will highlight why I am over qualified for this job. If you are worried about my nationality causing a problem, don't worry! I have always lived on a canal boat in international waters so have no nationality. The return address goes to my dubious accountant in the UK who rows out to me to deliver my mail once a decade.
Thanks in advance
Kind regards
Alex Ander
